Lack of Intimacy in Your Marriage? Learn How to Re-Establish Physical & Emotional Intimacy

It's shocking how many couples suffer from a lack of intimacy in marriage. Research indicates that 17 million married people in the United States don't have sex anymore, period. No studies support the number of people who live with a lack of emotional intimacy in marriage, or spiritual intimacy or any other type of intimacy. At its core, intimacy is about being able to share with your partner. The ideal marriage includes emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, spiritual intimacy, recreational intimacy, financial intimacy and sexual intimacy.

If your marriage is lacking any of these forms of intimacy, now is the time to address the problem - before it drives you or your spouse to divorce. For more tips to improve marriage and address a lack of intimacy in your marriage, sign up for our free marriage tips newsletter.

Make time for building intimacy in your marriage.
One of the biggest problems that most couples have with any type of intimacy is finding the time for it. Between work, caring for children, maintaining a household and trying to have a social life, it can be virtually impossible to spend time alone with your spouse. You have to overcome the time hurdles and make time to spend with your spouse. Dealing with a lack of intimacy in your marriage requires you to spend one-on-one time to reconnect with your spouse. Intimacy takes time, so give yourself time. Don't just try to seize a 20-minute window - make it an hour, and take the time to really connect with your partner.

Remember that men and women have different needs.
If you're dealing with intimacy issues in your marriage, it's essential to remember that men and women have different needs. Men are simple, and can be satisfied very quickly. Women are complex, requiring a lot of attention and effort just to 'get them in the mood.' If you wonder why there's no intimacy in your marriage, think about how you and your spouse approach sex. Do you approach your spouse and say "Hey, we've got a few minutes, let's go!" or do you give your spouse subtle hints, compliments and kisses to get them in the mood? One easy way to overcome a lack of intimacy in your marriage is to take more time during sex and engage in more foreplay. Especially if women have been caring for children all day, but even if you both simply lead a busy lifestyle, it takes a lot more work for a woman to get started. If you take more time for foreplay, you may find that you and your spouse are enjoying sex more and you might just find yourself doing it more often.

Emotional intimacy in a marriage is a big part of the equation.
Many couples find that they're not inclined to be physically close when they haven't spent a lot of time together and don't feel emotionally connected. Emotional intimacy is undeniably intertwined with physical intimacy, but it's also something that you and your spouse should make time to work into your marriage for its own sake. Emotional intimacy helps you continue to build that bond of trust with your spouse, and when emotional intimacy fails, one or both spouses may start to loose that 'in love' feeling, and may even fall out of love with their spouse. In order to preserve emotional intimacy in your marriage, you have to spend quality time together. Do activities together. You don't always have to be talking about your feelings - although you should do that from time to time, just so you can get practice sharing important things - but you must do things that are mutually enjoyable to keep the spark of emotional intimacy alive.

There's no shame in seeking help to deal with a loss of intimacy in marriage.
A lack of intimacy in marriage, either physical or emotional, can signal deeper issues in the marriage - or cause deeper issues, if left unresolved. If you and your spouse just can't seem to get on the same page, consider seeking help to deal with the intimacy issues in your marriage. With 15-20% of married couples living in a sexless marriage, a loss of intimacy in a marriage is a big problem, and one that you and your spouse need to work to resolve. Loss of intimacy in a marriage can lead to adultery, alienation and feelings of rejection for both you and your spouse. If you're having trouble resolving your intimacy issues on your own, there is no shame in seeking the help of a trained professional. Marriage counsellors are well versed in techniques to improve intimacy in a marriage, and turning to these professionals is a sure-fire way to affirm to you and your spouse that you're committed to improving your marriage. If you're not quite ready to seek out a marriage counsellor, try working through some of the exercises in the acclaimed Save My Marriage Today ebook by Amy Waterman.