How to Add Romance to Marriage - Put the Spark Back into Your Marriage
Bringing romance to a relationship is one of the most important aspects of building a successful relationship. People focus on romance during early phases of a relationship, trying hard to woo their partners during the dating process and putting a lot of thought into ways they can add romance to their relationships. It's a shame that people tend to ignore romance once their dating progresses to marriage. After people get through the 'newlywed' phase, the realities of every day life pervade any marriage, and romance fades to the background as couples focus on 'more important' aspects of their lives together.
Work, social gatherings and children often supersede the personal relationship of marriage, to the detriment of both parties. If you let the romance fade from your marriage, you'll be left with nothing more than a friendship or even a resentful partnership, which can lead to divorce or the long-term consequences of a failing marriage. In order to keep your relationship alive, you've got to add romance to your marriage to build a platform for long-term success. Our free marriage tips newsletter contains many ideas that can help your marriage, so if you're looking for extra information, subscribe for free here.
You can't add romance to your marriage without learning what's romantic.
What is romance, exactly? Men and women seem to have different ideas of what's romantic, and you could be pulling out all the moves to no effect if your spouse has a different idea of what romance entails. Ultimately, romance is anything you want it to be. Most people consider a quiet, candlelit dinner romantic. Some people would be put off by the concept of a candlelit dinner, considering it fake or corny. Other people love a romantic getaway; spending time alone with your partner in a quiet or exotic destination, with none of the realities of every-day life to intrude. Some people might hate this idea, preferring instead to be surrounded by crowds of people at a favourite destination. Find out what your partner considers to be romantic. Maybe it's a nice massage at the end of a hard day. Maybe it's cooking dinner, if they're normally the one that handles the cooking. Maybe it's a trip to a show or a movie they've wanted to see. It could just be saying "I love you" more often. Romance has many definitions, and all the research in the world won't substitute for the personal question: "What's romantic to you?" Just asking shows your partner that you're truly interested in them, which is the first step to bringing romance back into your marriage.
Find the time to put the romance back in your marriage.
Once you've gotten a good idea of what your partner considers romantic, you have to find time to do it. Most people enter a marriage with good intentions to honour their spouse and make them feel special, but every day life intrudes on this ideal and makes it difficult to find time to spend with your loved one. It's up to you to make the time to add romance to your marriage. Don't wait for life to slow down and become less busy to incorporate romance into your marriage, but instead schedule the time. Plan a weekly "Date Night." Put in a standing order with a reliable babysitter, find someone to cover work emergencies, and commit to spending one evening per week with your loved one. Don't cancel or reschedule date night - make it sacred. Make it a cornerstone of your relationship. Go to dinner, catch a show, take a walk, try something new together; the world is your oyster, as soon as you make time to take advantage of it. Spending time together is the most essential aspect of bringing romance back to your marriage.
For better or worse.
Don't focus on adding romance to your marriage only when things are good, or only when things are bad. When you get married, you're committing to your partner through thick and thin - and you can make your life together much easier if you remember to focus on bringing romance to your marriage in good times and in bad ones. If you can't afford to go out together, rent a silly movie and spend the night giggling on the couch. If you can't afford to hire a babysitter, put the kids to bed early and give your spouse a massage. Both of you work hard and deserve to be treated well, so remember that the next time you're stressed and tempted to neglect your spouse. Give; and ye shall receive - and this is true to bringing romance back to your marriage. If you work hard to build a romantic relationship through good times and bad, life will be much easier with a happy, satisfied, empathetic partner at your side.
Building a successful marriage doesn't start or end with adding romance to your marriage. A healthy, happy marriage requires a lot of work, and a little bit of know-how. There is a number of solutions to help you brainstorm your way to a successful marriage and give you a helping hand in the acclaimed Save My Marriage eBook Course.